Police: Not Even Pretending Any More

If anyone is in any doubt what’s wrong with the British Police, Inspector Gadget should dispel those doubts today. Institutionally, they have absolute contempt for the people they’re supposed to serve. This is why they should under no account be armed. The guns they do have should be removed. Use the Army when you need to shoot someone, because the police can’t be trusted to not shoot someone “armed” with a table-leg.

Contrary to Gadget’s claims that the police are “on the front-line, battling scum armed only with an aluminium stick” the truth is, the Policing in Britain is not a dangerous job. It doesn’t even make the top twenty. Fishermen, soldiers, scaffolders and Bicycle couriers all face a greater risk of death or serious injury. Arming the police would only result in more heavilly armed scallywags. Anyone think it’s a good idea?

Gadget’s response to Galloway’s win in the Bradford west by-election:

No one really minds when an extremist makes it to the local council, or as a one-term MP during an unpopular parliament. Their ability to influence events is minor; there are always other councillors or MP’s to provide a firewall.

His view is that democracy is OK, so long as it doesn’t take any important decisions. He goes on about “the swamp”, whines about the bureaucracy, disrespects his superiors and demonstrates contempt for both democracy and the chain of command, yet wants me to let him have a GUN? No WAY! Because I know who that gun will be pointed at, and it isn’t the armed scallywags from the Swamp estate (they’re too much work for our brave plod, when armed with just a machete). It will be me, next time I point out that “I didn’t actually swear there, officer. You imagined it, and I have video and audio to prove it. Would you like to hear then retract your allegation and threat of arrest?”

Yet the police still cruise around in their cars tooled up like the walter-mitty wannabe soldiers they really wish they were in their stupid, high-viz assault vests; yet refuse to investigate crimes adequately; blaming the CPS for their shitty “investigations”. They blame refusal to patrol “swamp estates” on lack of manpower, yet I see dozens cruising on foot in areas frequented by pretty tourists, harassing smokers for stepping over a line with a pint glass in their hands. Dozens waste whole days pointing speed guns at motorists, yet refuse to take action on clear video evidence of dangerous driving. Whatever the solution to crime and disorder in Britain right now, whatever the police are doing AIN’T IT. This is a complacent organisation riven with contempt for the people it’s supposed to serve, which has for decades been given too much power; power which has utterly corrupted them. Believe me, their contempt for the public is returned, in spades. The only people who still “support” the police, are those who’ve had no contact with ’em.

Elected police commissioners does not mean the “politicisation of the Police”. It means that someone chosen other than by a cozy meeting between establishment players nodded through by toothless local “democracy” will have actual power over the Police and their priorities. The people might actually get their voices heard when they feel totally let down because they know to whom to write. Galloway may be a rabble rousing dictator-and-terrorist apologist, but so’s Ken Livingstone and the Met police didn’t fall to pieces under him. Indeed, the police seem to prefer Livingstone with whom they seemed to find much in common, to the much more activist and liberal Boris. The police Nationwide are going to be accountable to people again – yes the people might elect Galloway to run a police force. He may even be good at it – the record will show. If he’s not, he gets booted out.

Stand by, Gadget, you anti-democratic cryptofacist. You may not like the decisions “the people” make. That’s the point. YOU are not, nor should you be, in charge. You are MY servant, and I am NOT accountable to you. Do you want to know what a country looks like when the police ARE in charge? Myanmar, Aparthied South Africa, The Soviet Union (Russia now?). They’re all shitholes. If the Police’re against something, it’s probably a good idea. QED.

The police are stupid, lower middle-class, pig-ignorant, doughnut-munching filth; a Provisional wing of the Daily Mail; at once bullying and ineffectual. The British police now wear black shirts. They’re not even pretending any more.

14 replies
  1. Anonymous
    Anonymous says:

    You are clearly uneducated on any matters regarding the police and law & order. Tell me, fail the recruitment process for the police/military did we?? Did you resolve the riots and put yourself in harms way?? Didn't think so. Your blog is offensive and complete BS!! I'm sure you'll carry on chatting your rubbish why the rest of us work and pay taxes.

  2. Raedwald
    Raedwald says:

    Excellent post, Jackart. Gadget is typical of plods who see themselves as 'a people apart', accountable only to something termed 'the rule of law'. You'd have to be insane to give them firearms.

    Poorly educated, highly opinionated, with limited social skills and 'chippy' seem to be Hendon's entry requirements. Piss poor fire discipline, with many firearm discharges that would be classed as negligent in the army makes armed Plod a danger to their colleagues and the innocent public.

    Look, there are lots of strong but dim blokes who can be trusted to polish their boots, want a social status marginally above labourers and under supervision can be used to maintain public order. Such was the Plod of years past. Such men should make up 85% of our police forces – but definitely without firearms, and on a lot less than £35k.

  3. mister_choos
    mister_choos says:

    @Anon 3

    I believe Jackart was in the Army I'm sure he will correct me if I'm wrong).

    So there is a fair chance that he has put himself in harm's way. Quite probably against people who will shoot back, unlike most people the police meet.

    Alot of jobs call for people to put themselves in dangerous situations. Perhaps not danger from people, but they can kill you just as well.

    And did you resolve the riots? I thought for most of the time the police stood around watching.

  4. Maverick
    Maverick says:

    @ Anonymous – you have absolutely no thought processes going on there, have you?

    This piece is brilliant although I would have to say that I know and have met many fine "coppers" who are brilliant human beings just doing a job and exercise more than a modicum of commonsense. If only the decent majority could weed out the "scum" and ensure they do not infiltrate the organisation in the first place they would command more respect.

    I do agree with you on the firearms issue in that if a copper cannot tell the difference between a table leg and a gun then he has no right to carrying a firearm .. period. Rule (whether written or not) in the Army is from memory that you cannot engage a terrorist/civilian target until you have "clearly indentified" a weapon .. not a piece of 4 x 2 !!!

    As for riots .. don't make me laugh … police beat a man to death for walking away with his hands in his pockets – was he a potential threat (eh anonymous)..

    Unfortunately the UK is in a shit state thanks to years of public apathy and allowing those in charge (politicians) to slowly cor-all them into the plantation they are creating and most are too dumb to see it …

    The average policeman only sees life from his own bubble as do the masses .. and as long as they have Kyle and X – Factor or footy, some money left over for a beer then all is well …

  5. cuffleyburgers
    cuffleyburgers says:

    top post jackart, the police absolutely must not be armed unless the gun laws are repealed also for civilians (of course police are also civilians in the peelian principle).

    I have no doubt there are many fine officers but the overarching culture is as you describe.

    My god with their black shirts and absurd hi vest vests they look like fucking idiots, and they all too frequently act like ignorant thugs.

    I will never forget the video of four of them sashing a blokes windscreen for not wearing a seatbelt.

    The police along with the BBC and parliament are another symbol of the cultural decline. To people of my generation all three have squandered the respect built over by their founders and forbears in a quite staggering way. Any private organisation that did so would be utterly defunct.

    SOmething has to be done, elected police chiefs may be it.

  6. jc
    jc says:

    Hello – I love your blog as rarely disagree with what you say and even then, only mildly. I read this today in a bar and nearly cheered out loud.

    I do have a problem with the police – the concept is of course sound but the reality of the modern UK police is despicable. But that perhaps is a subset of the UK's whole justice system which became so vile under new labour. It's discriminatory, authoritarian and based on hysteria, sentimentality and the inverted racism/sexism of modern Guardian style "liberalism". At the same time I feel a lot of sympathy with the ordeal of trying to police within the modern over-regulated environment. And to be fair I've heard more sense out of the mouth of senior policemen on tricky issues like drugs (on which I'm with you entirely) and prostitution etc. But just as I'm starting to like them again I hear them spouting infantile victim support flannel "our thoughts are with the family…", racially and sexually discriminatory policing (it should be irrelevant whether a crime is racially/sexually motivated – assault is assault is assault) Just get your fucking thoughts on solving the crime. Try getting them round when you've been burgled (3 days in my case). When my motorcycle was stolen recently, the police cost me more than the thieves did. I honestly wish I'd never reported it. Our local plod has taken to hiding behind the bushes on stretch of road that goes over a railway bridge to apprehend us cyclists who ride on the pavement there (we do so (yes I pushbike it to work) because the pavement is a cyclepath before and after the bridge but the road is so narrow at that point that cycling on the road is impossible). I "should get off and push it" at that section, according to Mrs Plod who stopped me and threatened me with a fine. As you say…have they nothing better to do?

  7. Anonymous
    Anonymous says:

    England is a horrible place to drive a car. Cameras, police and restrictions every 100 metres. Fucking hell, why do people put up with it?

  8. Anonymous
    Anonymous says:

    Hi Jackart,

    As a long time reader of both your and gadgets blog, I have noticed with increasing horror the growing shitty attitudes of gadget and his colleagues.

    Unfortunately, with the police now expected to enfore the "law" against someone taking offence as well as being the social worker for the utterly useless bottom 5% I can partially emphasive with the shit sandwich they have to eat each day.

    Doesn't however excuse some of the prize dicks in the force though…

    And thye fish truly rots from the head – the level of endemic corruption at the Met is stomach churning – especially as that prize fool "Sir" Ian Blair is getting away scott free it would seem.

  9. Dr Melvin (banned from most police blogs) Gray
    Dr Melvin (banned from most police blogs) Gray says:

    Gadget topics and comments submitted thereto, provide a glaring insight into the crude minds and conduct of those employed as UK police.

    However, the deceit which she shares with some of her commenters, is that Inspector Gadget is no policeman. She is a civilian employed by a Police Authority. It is highly probable that her blog has the backing and connivance of the most senior police officers at the Wiltshire headquarters where she is employed.

    The Gadget blog is a cesspit of cowardly libel and has done more to bring the reputation of British Policing into disrepute than the very worst (known) incidents of police malfeasance.

  10. Anonymous
    Anonymous says:

    If you want to know why the Police can manage with a 40% cut, look at the payout given to Brian Paddick (LibDem candidate for the London Mayor). His tax-free lump sum looks like a small lottery win, and his pension (after 31 years service, and taken at age 49) is around the same as an MP's salary (i.e. not inconsiderable), or the salary of a moderately senior University Professor …
    His Wikipedia entry might tell you why he got so much.


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